Ep. 4.3 Busy and Fat

In this episode we get real- we find out the most opposite thing about each other, talk about what compells us to be or not to be busy, and in the Wheel World we really get into the meat of it on the covert pad controversy. 

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Transcript

Rebel: 0:00

Hey what's up everybody? Welcome to skate day. Yo,

Shove: 0:12

what's up?

Rebel: 0:13

It's the podcast where shove and rebel talk about stuff. I'm rebel.

Shove: 0:21

I'm shove,

Rebel: 0:22

and together we are shovel.

Shove: 0:24

Can you dig it?

Rebel: 0:26

Yeah,

Shove: 0:27

I can't barely dig it today.

Rebel: 0:29

I'm having a hard time digging it today to I'll be honest, it's

Shove: 0:31

about time or we'll have an off day. If you've been listening to the beginning, you know that I shove often. I'm like, Well, it's the first time this season literally like three episodes. And I'm just like, do we have to do this? I did not want to do this emotionally physically. I just like my soul does not want to be

Rebel: 0:54

I get it. I really didn't think I wanted to do it last week, like record last week so that it could go out this Wednesday? Or were we busy like what happened last one really busy

Shove: 1:07

got too late. So now we're recording today because it's my weekly now. And the reason we probably both what mostly me I could speak for myself don't want to be here is because, um, we spent the whole weekend in the sequoias and that was like a four hour drive there. photoshoot in like the snow. And like it was just like a lot. It was very draining. Literally, I just felt like I wanted to shut down even during an app. And then it was just a lot. And then we just got home today. And then it's like podcast time. And it's just like, I want to do nothing until because tomorrow, the work day work week and school week starts all over again.

Rebel: 1:48

Yeah, and I remember now why we didn't record it last week. And it's because we had just got home from Phoenix from the gym show. And I had literally one day before I then left at like 6am to go to Maryland,

Shove: 2:04

which goes exactly into what the main things we'll be talking about today, which is being busy, and why some people feel the need to be busy. Rebel, and some people are like busy. Why the fuck would I want to do that? Me. So yeah, that's what we'll be talking about. And anyways, back to the intro. We talked about or two roller skaters who fell in love as you know, and kind of talked about everything from the real world to the real world. And I think we're ready right now to jump into the real world.

Rebel: 2:36

Yeah, let's go into the real world

Shove: 2:52

Oh real world tell

Rebel: 2:54

me how I completely forgot like half of our intro was like, Alright, let's start talking and shove was like maybe we should complete the intro first. Anyways,

Shove: 3:06

he will busy be we're talking about getting busy. Yeah, keep on talking about what you were trying to talk about. So

Rebel: 3:11

what I was gonna say was, let me just let me just preface this whole episode. Because I feel like it's very fitting. And the reason why is let me tell you about the last week. So last weekend, me and shove went to Phoenix to the Tucson gem show, to pick up crystals for our wedding and to visit our friend Heather. And so we left on Friday, we drove out to the Tucson gem show. We celebrated Heather's birthday with her on Friday. On Saturday, we went to Tucson gem show we were there the whole day. And it was very overwhelming and very exciting and awesome, but also like overwhelming, right. And then on Sunday, we went to the skate park and then we drove back home. We arrived home pretty late on Sunday night. Then Monday was like work and everything. We had one day of Monday and I had a bunch of stuff to do. And then the next day at 6am. I left on a flight to Maryland to do a gig with La Roller Girls skating for this like Southwest convention and Seagrams and like all this stuff. I was there Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, flew back Thursday morning. Well, technically all day. Tuesday was all day Tuesday it was flying travel. Then we went out on Tuesday night. Wednesday was a performance and then all day Thursday was travel. I came back I immediately started working again. And then Friday morning. We left or Friday we left for the sequoias to do our engagement shoot. And, you know tomorrow is and then we came back Sunday. And then we have Monday Tuesday Wednesday and on Thursday. I leave for New York for a trip skating trip. Anyways, I'm not usually this busy, but I just thought, oh my god, wow, I really did it to myself this time. But I do, for the most part really enjoy being busy. Like if I'm not busy, we get, you know, rebel not being the best human being in the world. Right? We all remember the summer of 2018 this um, by we all I mean me and shove remember the summer of 2018, which was a summer where idle hands found lots of trouble and shove got mad at rebel a lot because I don't know what the hell I was doing in the summer 2018 But I wasn't doing anything productive. And so that's, that's making nice of it. So like, I do well, when I am busy. Yeah, shove on the other hand. What how do you feel about being busy?

Shove: 6:00

Um, I don't really like to be busy because it's so draining on me mentally. I like to do things here and there. I don't like when things are back to back. I don't like doing multiple things in one day. Like, that doesn't sound fun at all to me. It's just like, I want to chill. I have to know ahead of time what we're doing. If it changes, I'm a little better at like going with the flow, but I don't want it to be like, bam, bam, bam. I don't want to be Lady Gaga. I don't want plane nother plane club. Nothing like no sleep. No, no, no. But guess what? Ever since I've been with this woman, that's what my life. My life were like it's minus a pandemic, like hardcore pandemic year. Or two, I'll say 2000 to 2001 2000 to

Rebel: 6:52

2001.

Shove: 6:55

Feels like it's been 2120 to 2021. I would say, Oh my God, how many years has it been?

Rebel: 7:04

We've been together for five years? Yeah, as of March 30. Yeah, technically,

Shove: 7:09

we're crazy. I was gonna say six years. But yeah, five.

Rebel: 7:13

We've known each other for six years, three years

Shove: 7:15

of my life has been chaos. So I'm, like, busy. And it's funny, because like, people will be like, Oh, we should hang out. Or we should do this. And we oh my gosh, like Sorry, like, this is happening. Or sorry, this is happening. I've checked my calendar. I'm like eight out of the 10 things. And it will make yourself busy. I'm like, It's not me. I'm just fell in love with a busy person. So like, sometimes it sucks, because there are things that like, I miss out on doing that I want to do. But a lot of those things are like worthwhile, like this weekend. It's like, I was looking forward to it for a long time. And it was amazing. It was fun. But then, of course, I missed the rollout that I really wanted to go to. But that took and I thought it was going to but it was like, Oh, I got the dates mixed up. And that's like fine things happen. Or it's like those little things like, oh, come over and let's do this. And it's like, oh, no, I'm in Arizona that weekend. Or oh, we're doing who knows what.

Rebel: 8:12

What's crazy is I don't feel like we're that busy.

Shove: 8:15

I find your problem.

Rebel: 8:16

I don't know. I know, like in the back of my head. Like I'm aware that we're busy. But it's like doesn't feel like that. To me. It feels like just live in life.

Shove: 8:27

It took us like three, maybe four months to do an interview on the skater it podcasts. Why? Why did it take that long? Because

Rebel: 8:37

we were so busy. But we're just

Shove: 8:39

not busy. No, I

Rebel: 8:41

know, we're busy. But I just feel like we just have a life. Like we like do things like I one's

Shove: 8:47

life is like this.

Rebel: 8:49

I mean, I guess I've just always I've always done lots of things. So I don't really know what it's like to not do things. Like what what was your life like? Like when it comes to like doing things before me like what did you did you just were you just like, I'm just gonna watch TV tonight. Or I

Shove: 9:11

would go to friends houses a lot. And we would literally just chill and talk. We would loiter at coffee shops for hours, sometimes talking. So I'm just existing. It's a lot of just existing like when you leave town. I like feel so centered and calm and peaceful. I don't get bored. Like for me. It takes a lot for me to be like I'm bored. And I remember there were times where I'd like Oh, well. I'm actually bored right now. I think since I've been with you I've never been bored. Remember last time I said I'm so bored right now and listen was at work.

Rebel: 9:42

That's so funny. I literally said it the other day.

Shove: 9:45

Yeah, because you have to be stimulated nonstop.

Rebel: 9:51

Hmm. I don't think that's true. I think there are times when I want to be like chill,

Shove: 9:56

because even a lot of times we have a movie on like you're on your phone at the same time. Yeah, because

Rebel: 10:01

sometimes it's not that interesting to me.

Shove: 10:04

Well, I think a lot of it has to do with your ADHD and a lot of st with just your personality. And like you like for me, I love privacy. I love silence, like, even on the drive, like, I was like, put music on my I was just like, no, like, can't we just exist in silence. And she hated that. And I just thought it was like a beautiful view. Like, let's just take it in, like, for me, like sensory overload is real, like, I can just like, like me, and my best friend Haley can literally just sit somewhere. Like, she came over and played. Wow. And I watched a show, and it was great. We barely talked to each other, we laugh and something funny happened. And that was it. We got food. And I was just like, so nice. And it was just like, not having to like entertain, engage, or like, do anything like, I don't know,

Rebel: 10:55

I do that a lot though. Like, I do that so much of my day, like, almost every day I sit in silence, or like do something in silos

Shove: 11:05

doing something No, like, you have to be a busy like you make a list. Even on your off days, there's always a list. So you're not just existing, if you have a list.

Rebel: 11:15

But how am I going to remember what to do next. If I don't have a list

Shove: 11:20

not doing anything, means you don't have to do anything that so doesn't matter if you forget something because there is nothing to do that.

Rebel: 11:26

I don't understand that does just nothing to do zero. That is like you don't need to catch up on anything. Like you don't have a project you want to do

Shove: 11:35

to like, I'm off tomorrow, you know, sleep in Nice. And then you just sleep in, and then you lay there you put on your phone, and then you just sit and daydream. That's my day. I daydream a lot. Like that's why people might think I'm just sitting there are staring off MySpace, but I'm daydreaming and then like, that's my entertainment. And then I'll get like an idea like, oh, man, rad coffee, so I'm so bummed right now. So then I'll drive to get coffee. Maybe you have a good day or like you're like, I'm gonna get dressed up, just get dressed up, get dressed up, go get coffee, get my coffee, go for a drive, play some good music. I like come home cuddle with Bowie. Daydream some more and be like, Oh my God, that show that don't even watch that. I know rebel. Like, I should start watching that. But add on, play on my phone a little bit. Talk to Bowie. And then I'm like, Oh, it's getting pretty late. Guess I'll go to bed. And that's a wonderful day for me.

Rebel: 12:30

I just feel like if that was my day, I would be like, I feel like I wasted a day.

Shove: 12:37

Yeah, but that's the thing. You always feel like, Oh, you have to do everything. You have to do everything. You got to live life to fullest. You should be working on something. Time is money. Gotta go go go.

Rebel: 12:45

But I don't think about it in the money's terms. Like I actually like doing the things that I do.

Shove: 12:51

No, I'm not saying like, literally like, like that attitude.

Rebel: 12:55

Interesting. Okay, so I don't even know what to ask. So I guess, i i value busyness or I

Shove: 13:08

see I see it as a bad thing. Like when we're like, like, for me, it's like, Oh, I'm so busy. Like, I'm busy. I have so much debt. You're like, oh my god, we have so many things to do. Like, oh my god, it'd be so fun. We have so many activities planned, like all of that. And for me, it's just like, oh my god, we have so much to do. And then there's like those activities we have to do like blah blah, like when am I gonna have time to rest? And for you just you see it as a positive I see it as a negative.

Rebel: 13:36

Oh, that's super interesting. I think that might be the most opposite thing about us.

Shove: 13:42

Well, because like when I am too busy, it's like also the fear because it's like, I know what's going to follow being busy, like, my depression can get activated triggered like I want to shut down I don't I want to be completely alone. Like, I don't want to be touched at all. I don't want to have to talk to anyone. I don't like I just want to like be in a cave because it's just too much for me like so if I don't have that time to just exist in silence or like not have to worry about anything. i It's like my I get overworked. Like, completely see I

Rebel: 14:14

understand that feeling though because like for example this last week, that is not a typical week for me that was way too busy. And several times throughout the week I exhibited that same like signs of way over stimulation away over too busy, and like kind of shut down and like did not have a great mental week because of it. Typically, I don't take three trips during one week. That's just the way the cookie crumbles this last week, but I also feel like for me, I they're like to do list items that are like work, obviously. And then there's to do list items that are like fulfilling to me. And like even if I was to have like an app Saluton nothing day, like a spa day or something where I didn't think about anything I would want to, like, make a list of all of the things that I wanted to do for self care day. You know, Amy, like how would want to be like, shower? Like, don't forget to paint your nails or like, see, like

Shove: 15:20

when you were gone, and I was like, sitting here and then I was like, Oh yeah, I've been wanting to like get myself a pedicure. So I went ahead and did that. But it wasn't like on a list. It was just like, what pops in my head?

Rebel: 15:32

Oh, I, you don't have 800 million things going on in your head all the time, though.

Shove: 15:37

My 100 million things are things about like horrible things will happen. Like, if rebel dies tomorrow, I wouldn't know how to access anything or know how to handle anything. And I'll think it all the way through. And then I'm like, that will go on to another thing. And then I think about like my dad like how he's getting older when he dies? And and how am I gonna handle that? What am I gonna do with the motorcycle? What am I doing with this car will barely make it to the wedding and a lot of things about death a lot about things, all emergencies. Just like in general, like my anxieties, like, I don't think about what I'm gonna do for the day, I think about what's gonna happen in life. Like, I have a thing and scenarios, like my mind is full of scenarios of horrible things happening. And memories and flashbacks and trauma. That's what happens.

Rebel: 16:26

That sounds like a terrible place to be.

Shove: 16:28

Yeah, that's why and then like, all those go on fire, when it's when I'm stressed. They go hider.

Rebel: 16:34

That sounds awful. I'm so sorry. That that's what's happening in your head all the time.

Shove: 16:42

pretty often. That's why I try to like I'll daydream about like positive things sometimes, which is nice. But then my mind will go to other places. Oh, usually, if I'm stressed, like if I'm like, overworked or whatever. And then I'm like, my anxiety kicks in, and then those go up. But lately, the one that's been on my head a lot is about like, oh, like, if she dies, like I'm fucked, like I don't know, where and how to access anything. And an important information like she has all that information, because it's like, you're the one that relationship they handle that. And then I was like, oh my god, I'm just another dumb woman, like in the 50s. It's just like, blah, blah, blah. And then those guys are like, I don't know what to do with anything.

Rebel: 17:21

But like, you didn't know all the passwords to ever say that. But I

Shove: 17:25

don't know. I'm just saying like, I don't like you say that. But like that information. I'm just like, oh, everything's fine. But like, that's like one of my anxieties. Like there'll be certain things that I focus on for a while. And then we'll just like, come back to it. All right.

Rebel: 17:39

Well, I'll make you a list of what to do if I ever die.

Shove: 17:43

There should be like binders which would be a binder, I'll

Rebel: 17:45

make a binder a death binder for yes. Yeah, sure.

Shove: 17:49

I'll do that for you. Mine's easy. It's just give all my clothes to helium Slayer.

Rebel: 17:54

No. I'm keeping every single one of your clothes if you die, you're a psychopath. I don't care if my clothes. No, no, no, I'm sorry. You leave

Shove: 18:06

my body? Yeah, I'll do that. Spread my ashes. Yeah, I'll do that and give lockets to my important people with my ashes. No,

Rebel: 18:16

yeah, I'll do that. But I'm not giving away your clothes, because I'm going to wear them every day for the rest of my life.

Shove: 18:21

No, that's why you keep like the jackets and the hoodies, but you can't wear anything else.

Rebel: 18:24

Oh, yeah. Are you sure? Cuz I'm pretty sure I can. Anyways, I so what's in my head all the time is I think that's interesting that yours is all like long term stuff. Because none of mine is long term. ADHD, like it's all short term stuff. Like it's but it's like a million short term things. Like, when we were in the car driving home. I thought about so many different things. And I'll like problem solve in my head, but then it'll just jump from one thing to the next thing. Like I'm trying to figure out a problem that I have that I'm like, yeah, anyways, but like that. And then I'll think about like, different like DIY projects, like I was thinking about how I needed to tie the strings on the like, hanger things that I have, like, I was just thinking about all of that kind of stuff. And so if I was to have like a non busy day, I wouldn't. Like if I just did everything that popped in my head, like it would be on it would be so chaotic. It would be unnerving even to me so like my to do list actually soothe me like it actually makes me so that I don't just like dart from place to place and when

Shove: 19:35

I look at your to do list because it's so long I stress and like that's too much

Rebel: 19:39

stuff. It's because there's so much going on in my head. And if I don't write it down on a piece of paper, then it stays in my head circulating. But if it's on a piece of paper my brain knows that it can let me forget it. So then I could focus on

Shove: 19:54

some are jumping off the subject here like this could be a whole nother subject to another episode. Yeah, anyways, So busyness you're for you like to be busy. I don't like to be busy. You listening or watching and do you like to be busy, but like,

Rebel: 20:08

I like to be busy, but I also like not being busy.

Shove: 20:12

I can tell when you're finally tapped out because we'll come home from something. And like we'll literally like lay with like maybe like one leg on each other and we'll be on Tik Tok or Instagram both scrolling for like an hour or two straight not saying a single word to each other. And that's what I'm like. This BZ finally feels my level. I know exactly what you're talking otherwise. She just keep talking and talking and talking and talking. And she's like, in a happy mood. She's just going I'm gonna show like, let's craft let's play a game. We could go anywhere. And like, but everyone's Well, she finally gets tapped out. And I'm like, think, or someone walked in the room and was like, you want to do this? You'd be like, Yeah, that's the difference. I would be like, No,

Rebel: 21:01

yeah, I do think that I've gotten better to it letting you like decompress and do your thing. Like for example, today, we got home from wherever we were at the sequoias and, and I like walked in the door and immediately started making earrings. And you like went to the bedroom and started playing in your phone. And I like made earrings. I like put like strings on things I unpacked. And then I went and I did orders. And then I was like, let's do the podcast.

Shove: 21:32

I also cooked for us.

Rebel: 21:33

Oh yeah, you cooked. And then I was like, let's do the podcast. You were like no. And I was like, You're right. I don't want to do it either.

Shove: 21:39

And then No, you didn't want to do it. But then she said that my attitude made her angry. It did make me angry. But because your imaginary friend

Rebel: 21:51

and now I don't feel angry anymore. Things just weren't working. It was very frustrating. My

Shove: 21:56

brain just says Wouldn't you like to be in bed scrolling on your phone right now? Or like watching what we do in the shadows. I finally started watching it.

Rebel: 22:04

Understand? What's that show about? I don't get it. Oh, I'll

Shove: 22:07

talk about it later. Okay, wanna move along? Or anything else? No,

Rebel: 22:11

I don't. I think that that's all my thoughts about being busy. Except that I'm curious. How many of you are like me, and how many of you are like shove, which I know what I've just said. So I'm just reiterating. Please tell us because I want to know if I'm not alone in this world. You're alone. I know for sure that Jessica Savage is like me. And Heather is like you and Haley is like you actually more people than not are like you.

Shove: 22:36

Thank God.

Rebel: 22:39

Anyways, okay, well, that's enough about the real world. Let's go to the wheel world.

Shove: 22:44

Let's go

Unknown: 23:01

okay,

Rebel: 23:01

did you know I saw this and this is not the wheel where it is the wheel world but I'm just let intro into the wheel. Okay, so I saw this on freakin, like a meme or Instagram post or whatever, that someone said that millennials do hearts like this. If you're listening, it's like with two hands and you're making the heart together. And then that Gen Z people do a heart like this. And for people not watching. It's like your thumb and your index finger. It's like the world's smallest little heart.

Shove: 23:35

But I feel like but wait, like this. So makes a little heart like this. Yeah, but I was like,

Rebel: 23:42

I mean, it doesn't look like a heart. And I had never seen it before. But I can see where it looks like a heart. I literally thought this person was doing the world's smallest violin and that

Shove: 23:51

it's more like it looks like an atomic heart from one point of view. If anything, which I would get like make an atomic cart out of your hand. I mean, your face makes more sense. Yeah, you know, whatever. Oh,

Rebel: 24:03

do you mean an anatomical heart? Yeah, I was like a Watson atomic guard.

Shove: 24:09

I didn't realize oh, I'm saying Oh, I

Rebel: 24:12

get what you're saying. Wouldn't it look kind of like oh, it's the other way? Oh, yeah. Because of the like little wouldn't it be good? My gut? Any? I don't know. Whatever. Do you not know what I heard? It looks like I don't know. It's been a long time since I've been in biology class. You didn't have

Shove: 24:25

biology class. Yes. Anyway, so this is the world world.

Rebel: 24:29

Yeah, well, world is where we talk about rollerskating despite not having yet talked about robots,

Shove: 24:33

not about generations and how they make hearts. Anyways, if you follow me on Instagram, which you can be weird if you actually listen to this podcast and you're like, I don't follow you. But you never know. You never know. I know. It feels like we're late but we're bi weekly. So it happens. You probably heard about the whole pad debacle.

Rebel: 24:56

I know literally shove was like what if we talked about the pads and I was like What are you even talking We've definitely talked about that already. But

Shove: 25:01

because it's very often the skate community and every community where something happens, and then it's like a big uproar, and then a week later everyone's like la la, la, la,

Rebel: 25:12

la La, and I think,

Shove: 25:15

which is like, Fine, I guess for like the masses, but as long as like some sort of change was actually done like among the important people. So I don't know, I'm mixed feelings about it. But anyways.

Rebel: 25:27

Yeah, so what we're talking about is the pad debacle, which

Shove: 25:30

was triple eight release a new pad. They did the sleeves, which they've had before, but like all people didn't know about them. I personally don't wear AAA because I never tried to because they only had small sizes or sizes are very small. So I just like I mean, it was like, well, that's not for me, like whatever we have 187. So in Derby, that's what I wore. And then the Moxie 187 ones that I helped me are those. So homography was like, well, now we're gonna do a collab with AAA. I assumed, like some other people, apparently, that would have all sizes, just like our other pads. So I was like, sweet, I'm so excited, yada, yada, yada. And they come and we see they go that we have small that even extra small, they have small, to extra art small to large, small to

Rebel: 26:21

medium large.

Shove: 26:24

And I was like, What the fudge? Like, why this is so ridiculous. So yeah, so like, I was like, Well, I'm not allowed to talk about them because they're new. Because like, that's why it's weird. Because like I work for like Moxie. And then it's like to speak out. It's like, there was like a thing where I was like, Oh, shit, and I'll probably get in trouble. But as a fat advocate, and a fat skater, like, I gotta say something because if I didn't work here, I definitely would say something. And like,

Rebel: 26:53

you're not in charge of making those products. Yeah, I think it's like very important to clarify that like, yeah, people just assume that because you made a thick set that you have a say and like a lot of products that Moxie makes and you don't Yeah, and like be like very

Shove: 27:05

which can be really hard because we go to amongst pizza calm and you look at staff page, it says Courtney shove director of merchandise, which which is true. Not true. I haven't done anything on merchandise for over a year now. So there's that. But so I think a lot of people were confused. And it's like, Well, why didn't you do this way to you, because like, I'm not in those meetings. I not in that room. Like, I don't have any fucking power there. So I know, it could be like, hard. I'm one of like, seven people that work there. But none of the people that I work like hands on with knew this was gonna happen. So all my skinny coworkers were also like, upset about it. And I'm the one that filmed them for this year, so people were like, Oh, I hate that it was just a bunch of skinny people. It's like, well, it had to be because only on one side large. So for me, I'm like, well, obviously, that's what I'm talking about the size and like, of course, it doesn't look inclusive. Because

Rebel: 28:00

how can I be?

Shove: 28:03

Oh, um, so I had like, I had fun that day. I was skating. And it was a really good day at work. But then I remember even started out with me like tearing up. I don't know if I told you about that. Like I showed up. But I purposely didn't put makeup on or anything because I was like, I'm just the one on skating with the camera. Like, obviously, I can't work with any products. I'm not going to be an app. And then they were like, well, maybe like, maybe we could do this. And like we could still be in it like you maybe try that elbow pads. I was like No, dude, like, I already know. Like, that's not gonna work. Like I just don't want to talk about XML already. phillium type away. And I like tear it up, as I was saying that, because it's just like upsetting like to be a fat skater and not feel to know that, like, people aren't still considering you that they're just thinking we can just make street sizes. And then if it does, well, like why are we an afterthought? Like, why are plus sizes always an afterthought? Why isn't it just like, included in the get go?

Rebel: 29:00

And you would think that after like, they had made the thickset that they would have learned it would have just been like, oh, yeah, like fat skaters exist and are important and made money off of them and like should be able to, like, be safe and also cute. Like, I don't know, it's just like, so weird to me. Yeah.

Shove: 29:20

So it was a whole thing. And of course, like my job wasn't like that happy about the way I they were not standard if they were not stoked. They were not stoked it. But like, at the same time, like, I felt like I did anything wrong. And I think they were just concerned about like, Why didn't come to them. But you did. But that's why I didn't say stuff. And like at the end of the day, like change was made. So they told me that and AAA announced like that they are gonna make bigger sizes. So that's good, but I don't know I don't know how to feel about it because it's still annoying. Like I'm glad that like, now they know but like it shouldn't take Like a call out calling on the internet to make you want to do what should we obviously right?

Rebel: 30:06

And I also just think like, I just don't believe that the next time. Like it's gonna be included the first time. Yeah, you know, I mean like if it happened with the thickset and then this happened, and then they finally make bigger sizes. Like what's to make them actually make bigger sizes next time? I don't know I just don't

Shove: 30:27

need TG T. What's that other RAM TX GTG oh my oh boy they called What are you talking about? You didn't see that post that other brand no one

Rebel: 30:37

that was like we do plus sizes and they only went up to an XL. I don't remember

Shove: 30:41

GE or something like that. Anyways, so like, someone texted me or wasn't shame. Someone was like, leave it to a man to try to be like, we're better than you. So anyway, so this brand t something whatever. They post this pad and they're like, we're inclusive extra small to extra large because we believe in all bodies and they put capital there so they like saw opportunity to be like but look at us. I like you. Oh my care have to exit. Only Wow, what do you do? You got to Excel. So I had commented I was petty and I was just like, oh my God for all bodies. I would love to try this. And you have a 3x 4x so I and then Shane went ahead and measured look at their measurement, their size chart. And he was like, it's only three centimeters of a difference from the large pad that three centimeters there extra largest three centimeters bigger. No than the large of the triple eight.

Rebel: 31:45

What the crap? Yeah,

Shove: 31:46

I did not know that. And everyone's sharing it like yeah, see? inclusivity? Um, of course, wait, do your research. And it was thin skaters. Like yeah, see, here we go. And it's like, like, extra large is not inclusive. Like, it's

Rebel: 31:58

literally not. It's not my okay.

Shove: 32:02

And then like, drop because all my mama worked on the pad, the coloring that came out and she messaged me, and she was like, or she commented and was like, oh, yeah, like it does. This one is bigger. And I was like, well, it's just hard for me to believe that extra large would fit and 3x. So I'm not sure like a 2x 3x. And she was like, Oh, when I get home like I'm on the road, like, I'll measure for you and just see. And then like, which was great. I've heard nice. I can't remember I need to check back to see if she did but I was just like, in my head like I know there's no way especially after shame like literally what society is literally like, yeah, like no. Yeah, nice. Right? And then 187 posted Jules, who is a fat skater in Canada. And she does like a whole thing with the, the derby pads we used to wear on them. And then she's a fat skater. She's like, my size and she's and it's like all about where to find precise gear and like so of course, they posted her tic tock. And it is like they saw an opportunity and ran with it too. Because they were like, Oh, we've ever posted we up. But then if you look at their profile on med school, it's not any fat skaters. And the jam DeLorean John DeLorean posted in their story. And they said, Oh, I just think it's funny because like everyone talks about size inclusivity. But all I ever see is Jules and shove and Jules and Shep and not only two thoughts,

Rebel: 33:30

there's so many more fat skaters out there. Yeah, like so many fat skaters. And also not all fat skaters want a high impact knee pad. No, that's the issue is that the only plus size like inclusive pads are this thick. Like the thick set is really high impact. Like a lot of skaters I can tell you for sure dance skaters. Like I've talked to several of them recently that are plus size are like yo, I want like the Bad's that I could wear to the rink, low key underneath my stuff, which I get because I spent the entirety of disco aces wearing knee pads, because I didn't know what the crap I was doing. And I felt all the time. And the only way I got those pads was because I ordered them from frickin Poland from this like dancewear company that I had to have the website translated and they made like special sizes.

Shove: 34:31

Oh my gosh, yeah, I just there's so many limited are like what like the heavy hitters are going to be s one triple eight 187. Who else? scabs

Rebel: 34:45

and polemics some they're just not big enough.

Shove: 34:48

No, but I mean like a heavy hitter like the main companies people get Padstow, yeah,

Rebel: 34:52

Impala. Yeah, lots of people get Impala pads.

Shove: 34:55

I see a lot of people like I see

Rebel: 34:57

people in the Impala pads. Mm. Hmm, a lot of beginners because they have the whole pad set. When you're a beginner, a lot of people will get the scabs pad set or the Impala pad set.

Shove: 35:08

Both of them like the impacts really bad, right?

Rebel: 35:11

I actually like the impact of the impalas. I am definitely too fat to wear them now. But when I was first doing my YouTube channel, I could fit in them in the XL.

Shove: 35:22

I'm just really pissed off that I can't fit them. Paula Valentine's

Rebel: 35:27

is so cute. Because you just skater

Shove: 35:31

ginger Taylor. She's an artist in Australia, I believe. She did the design, the whole capsule design and like the skateboard deck, so fucking cute. Like, I totally put that on our wall. And we should get that the pattern follow? Where are you at, and the pad set. It was really cute. It has like a little red heart in the middle of the shell. And they're so adorable. But anyways, come on, companies make over a large and over an extra large make over 2x make over 3x

Rebel: 36:00

And don't make us validate our existence like and like do your research. It made me so frustrated. That like what they were saying was, you know, like, fill out this survey, let us know that there's demand, like the demand.

Shove: 36:18

No, that didn't make me mad. Note that. Will they even Okay,

Rebel: 36:23

no, not the survey. But the survey, like the idea behind it that there has to be proof that there is demand.

Shove: 36:30

And that's what made more understanding because people got mad at Moxie for me like, Oh, you want us to follow a survey. And that was just Moxie having the power to be like, hey, AAA isn't doing it. So at least we're gonna do something to try and figure it out to show them proof. And that was a disconnect.

Rebel: 36:47

For me. What what made me the most angry was this company saying, show us proof that you're there and you'll buy in order for us to make this for you when there is proof already, because of the fixes.

Shove: 37:03

What is stupid is like, oh, yeah, there's going to be proof that they want it. We'll see how these sizes do. But it's like, how does that prove that like larger sizes one by skinny people buying them?

Rebel: 37:13

Yeah, like that doesn't make any sense. But also, couldn't you just like put a survey out? Like before you release? Yeah, like they might have like, a certain like any kind of market research, any sort of market research or research? Literally, there's been Yeah, the market research is already even done. Like they just had to find it. Like I don't know, like I just I'm a marketing professional. So like, It just pisses me I'd also

Shove: 37:34

had someone like I literally created a hashtag for SAT skaters. Come on companies. Look at hashtag fat skate love. Look at all the fat people reach out to those people for content because guess what they're wearing the fucking gear you probably make already. So you could post them just like you post all these other assholes. So they're not, I suppose, but you know what I'm saying. So it's just like, it's just like an afterthought that isn't as annoying as fat phobic.

Rebel: 38:01

It sucks. And the fight for inclusivity. Like within,

Shove: 38:07

you can't win it, you can never win because it's not just a fight that can be won or lost. It's something you have to work at and work for. And it's exhausting, ongoing. And it's like exhausting, especially the beginning. But I don't think it's exhausting forever. Because, like when it becomes your norm, if you just keep doing it, you do kind of break down from that fatphobia just like in race. Like when you're if you're like a racist person. Of course, if you're not around any black people, you don't give a fuck you have all these horrible thoughts. But then you realize, oh shit, I'm being racist. And then you start opening it up, you start educating yourself. And it's really hard because it's changing the way your mind works. But then all sudden, you have black friends, even you're more knowledgeable about it, and you already know what's wrong, what's not right or what's right and what's wrong. And it just starts coming naturally to you. And it's no longer tiring. A lot of you people realize that and 2020 and are a little bit better now for it. Same thing when it comes to fat people to fat phobia, homophobia, all the phobias. It's like, yeah, it's gonna be hard to be better at first, but it's not going to be tiring forever, because you are going to just know how to be a better person and know what's wrong with what's wrong. What's right.

Rebel: 39:21

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was saying that it was exhausting for us. Oh no, I was saying it's like exhausting for us to constantly fight it, but like to like know that we all have each other's backs. You know,

Shove: 39:37

I don't have anyone's back.

Rebel: 39:38

Yeah, you do. Shut up. Yeah, I don't know. So that was really I think frustrating but also, I don't know to me, it's just like Do you really think like, if I just don't understand on so many levels, because for me, I'm like, to our money like is money and like, money is just as great and you just like don't see it as real money or you don't see it as, or it's just like an afterthought like I just Yeah. I mean, I know, but I don't know. Any other things that you have to say about that?

Shove: 40:26

No, I guess that's it. Although I'll just throw this in here. It's not a skate thing. But it's a gym thing. There is one machine that I can't fit in. I keep using what is actually to what I can't use at all because it has like a seatbelt thing we had to put on. And then you can lift the weight when you do the booty one when you lift, like remember how I had you sit on my waist and then I went up and down the hip thrust or whatever. And it couldn't even close on hilly. So I was like, but there's the odd one where you like, get on your knees, and then you twist. Oh, that one was tight for me. Yeah, so I have one leg that goes in. And then my other knee kind of sits hovers and I just press it in. I love that. Yeah. So like, I feel like Jesus gyms are supposed to be not just for like, you think, Oh, I'm big. I'm gonna work out. Not that you should have to but I should be we're all sizes. Like it's just funny because they always have like, felt people should go to the gym more than you go to the gym. And then it's like, Oh, why is there a fat person working out or like, oh, or like it's just one machine. Also say like, their skill isn't fat phobic, which is nice. A lot of skills will not go over 300 power

Rebel: 41:37

like the Wii, the Wii scale thing that's like, Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's like, I don't actually have a wait for you. You're too much.

Shove: 41:48

Yeah, everywhere in the world from like, I've posted about it before like dentists, all his medical offices, like restaurants you go in, you can't even fit in the chair. There's so many things. You know, like certainly on Tik Tok, like things that Californians do that, like wouldn't make other people freak out. There's someone people started doing like, things that fat people experience that like skinny people should? We should? Yeah, but I have no idea. Yeah. And it's just like, yeah, not being more fit in the seeds. Like worrying about this, it's gonna break or like the booth at a restaurant or planes, like all the there's so many things. And to it's not just in the skate community, it's in the world all together. So if you're listening to this, and you are not a fat person, whether you're just mid size, small, fat, whatever it might be, if you can navigate the world and never have to think, well, I fit in this well, they have something that I can fit into, like that question you never had to worry about. Now that that's a privilege. And like, just think about it, like you probably have a fat friend. Are they gonna fit there? Are they going to be able to experience the same things you can do? Maybe if you're gonna go them all together? Does mall have even one plus size store? Or what is your fat friend just had to go buy a bunch of accessories and be awkward in every store and have a great experience like you? There's just so many random things you got to think about?

Rebel: 43:13

Yeah, like, like, I was talking to someone the other day about this. And I'm going to be vague on purpose, because it's, yeah. But every time almost every time that man shove, individually or separately go on a gig. Actually, I can only speak for myself. So anytime that I've gone on a gig, or I've gotten a gig with Chef 90% of the time, I'm required to bring my own wardrobe. Because they do not have clothes for me in my size. And this is for like long term gigs. This is for short term gigs. This happens very, very, very, very often, like majority of the time, I know that I'm going to need to pull things from my wardrobe. I even know what in my wardrobe that they like.

Shove: 44:04

And the chances are that like, in the beginning, probably for you to thought it was totally normal, thought it was totally normal. As soon as you have a gig that other people are involved, you feel like everyone else was giving clothes, everyone else is giving a plus size plus size B which of course will be either just one of us or both of us because there's always you just have to have you.

Rebel: 44:24

There's always one and I'm like just mid size enough to be like the fat person. But not like a truly like plus plus size. I don't even know how to explain it. But like, because I'm on the mid size like low small fat and like I'll just be like, Oh yeah, do you have this or do you have that and

Shove: 44:46

they'll literally like go through our Instagrams and be like, can you bring this this and this is like some of those things are like five years old. What are you doing?

Rebel: 44:53

I have seen many of my board have just my stuff. Yeah, why can't you just get us stuff? A lot of times they can't But I will say though, since I joined the LA Roller Girls, I've been, every I've been on two gigs. I know it's not a lot. I've been on two gigs as an official la roller girl. And both of them I've been provided clothes in my size. Nice. And that makes me feel so included and special. And I shouldn't feel like that is the biggest deal ever. Like, I literally feel like I'm gonna cry right now because I like I talked to the head of La Rollergirls about it. Like I talked to Crystal about it. She was like, like, what? No, we will always have quote, like, you're gonna like one. It's fine. Like, we will always figure it out like we will do. Like, it'll be fine. And I was just like, No, but you don't understand what a big deal that is. Like every other gig that I've had. So far, I've been given a, you know, a vision board of my own outfits. And when told to bring, I have literally brought an entire clothing rack to set. Yeah, more than once, like, more than five to like, many times have I been told to bring like my whole closet to set. Yeah, and not nothing against the people that have hired me. Thank you for giving me money. But also like, I literally thought that was normal until I did you know other gigs where people

Shove: 46:14

say, Wait, yeah, you brought your own clothes. What were we supposed to bring our own clothes, let's like yeah, and

Rebel: 46:19

they're just like digging into the uncomfortableness that is you having to pack your entire, like your entire closet, lug it all around. And never, they didn't never like get it from you, like you're always lugging it around. And then at the end of the gig, you always have to like put it all away. So you're like last to leave. Because you have to collect all your stuff, you come home, you make a mess, you have to put all your clothes away again. And it's just like, cool. And everyone else gets new stuff. And everyone else is like, potentially like oh, hey, you get to take this home, or you just like use this stuff on set. And then you leave it there. But yeah, so it's just different. It's different.

Shove: 46:59

I have one fashion brand dress that I love that I purposely just barely don't even wear, because I got so over it because I had to wear it for three gigs. Everyone I stopped telling them about because they'd be like, Oh, the pink one with the French, the pink one with the French, the pink one. They look great when you're skating. I'm like,

Rebel: 47:16

fuck them over this. That's how that's where I'm at with my cloud dress.

Shove: 47:20

And it's an expensive dress, so like to be like, Oh, you want me to skate around in the bins? Like the first expensive dress I ever bought myself. Like I was always it was like 200 $200 And that's a lot for a dress. I know it'd be more like that's not that much. It's a lot for a dress. And to know that like I just had to use an abuse it by like skating and hours for it. Like I don't get paid for that. And then that's another thing I'm realizing and like we should have we didn't know better. We could have been like, Okay, are you gonna pay us for our using our personal clothing? Yeah. For this gig like, so it's like frustrating, like, you live in eLearn. But yeah, fatphobia it's everywhere. Yeah,

Rebel: 47:58

that's how I feel about my cloud dress. Like enough people have asked to use it now. I'm like, I actually paid like$100 for that dress. And I want to wear it for myself and not for you. Thank you. And yes, got heated for a second there. But that's fine.

Shove: 48:14

Let's move on to some things we're obsessed with. Yeah.

Rebel: 48:31

These are my obsession.

Shove: 48:33

What are you obsessed with right now

Rebel: 48:35

wedding planning? Sure. I am totally obsessed with wedding planning right now. And I know that our wedding is a very long time away, but I'm very obsessed with it. I'm having so much fun. My best friend's made me a wedding planning binder. And I've been using it I put like a bunch of sheets in those like plastic protector those like sheet protectors. And so it's all nice and it's going to be preserved. And I've been taking notes and I put like our colors in there. And I'm going to put some pictures in there.

Shove: 49:07

And and you ask someone to be your bridesmaid

Rebel: 49:11

I officially asked someone to be my bridesmaid. So I have a one official bridesmaid so far. And it was so cute. And I'm just really obsessed. I'm so excited. Uh, we're totally out of wedding money so far, but we have lots of plans. And I'm having so much fun. I know I already said that. But I'm like, being a visionary. And then like, dreaming of creative ways to do things and writing things down that we have ideas about. And yeah, I'm just getting so stoked and feeling good. Love that we got our engagement photos this last weekend. because that was one thing I'm gonna list that has been coming for a very long time because yes, we did get engaged on February 22 2022. And yes, it is February, like the week of February 12 2023. But we officially did it before it was one year. So it's still in still in the engagement year. And yeah, so we have a location. We have a date. We have a photographer, and now we have lots of crystals for our centerpieces. I have a craft that I need to start doing that's also involving the centerpieces. And then we're gonna have pictures soon and I can't wait to see. So excited. Yeah, I even have a supplemental binder because one binder doesn't fit everything. So I got another binder to be supplemental. And I'm going to decorate like the front and the back. You know, like when you were in high school in middle school and you like made collages or pictures and stuff. And then you like put it in the front back. I'm gonna do that here. And it has tabs.

Shove: 51:04

Oh my god. It's so cute. Sound obsessed.

Rebel: 51:07

I am so obsessed.

Shove: 51:12

I am obsessed. I don't know. It was really an obsession. But I did binge watch something the other day. I was like, I kept seeing things online about like, episode three has made like triggered like traumatized. I cry faces and stuff. And I was like, What is this? I mean, it was like this show. The Last of Us. Oh, mg. Actually this new episode I need to watch. But I told her I was like you to watch it because it made me think view the love of the cried ugly cried so hard. She's like, I don't wanna be sad. I was like, but it's so good. It's about love. Which apparently like the whole game that it's after, like, the meaning of the whole thing is love and relationships. But of course that wouldn't be like exciting for people to play a game like that. That also has like these like fungus mushroom zombie like things in it. So like I had to have like this action and like all this like stuff. But all a mushroom zombie. Yeah, it's like a fungi that gets into your body. And then you like people and infect them. It's like an infection. But they start like the fungus takes over their body. And it's funny because it's based off this thing that like does exist, but it just doesn't affect humans. And I remember someone talking about like, this documentary where it happens to ants. And like, I remember watching that. So it's like a thing that gets in your body and takes over your brain. And so your body is still moving, but then it'll like

Rebel: 52:38

how fast does that happen? Fast? Oh, no. Yeah,

Shove: 52:42

so it's almost like a parasite. But it's a fungus. Fungus, it can only communicate to other

Rebel: 52:47

how do you how do you get it? Or is it says boiler so yeah, it could

Shove: 52:51

be a spool in the first episode. They've kind of let you know like kind of hint at it. And they're like, oh, it's probably from the food like probably gotten to the wheat because it is a fungus. Probably I'm sure the wheat like people ate a lot of bread or whatever it pie just got into your system. No, I eat lots of bread. Yeah, but don't worry, you're fine. But like they also mentioned like, oh, and the very being like it probably never spread unless like the temperature of the world got warmer. Just like global warming. Yeah. But anyway, so the show is like, really good. And I did watch the episode an ugly cried and rebel was out of town. And I was just like, oh, like holding

Rebel: 53:24

that when you texted me and you were like, I really wish you were here.

Shove: 53:27

No. Okay, that was another time. But yeah, so it's a really good show. I really like it. But the other one like on like, a Happy Show, is what we do in the shadows. I find like people are always like, show if you love the show, like you're gonna love it. And like I just started watching me and like I was actually like, my anxiety was so bad a day. And I was like depression but not really depression, I think just like anxiety. And it was like making me laugh my ass off. It's a mockumentary about vampires. So it's like, imagine there's a documentary like crew let's like fill me in vampires that have been around for 1000. roommates, the vampire house and they're all like completely different. And it's ridiculous. They still most of them dress old timey. And then one of them has a familiar who's like this guy named yermo. Because it's familiar for 10 years and all he wants to be as a vampire but like, he doesn't get turned in. He's just treated like a shitty like assistant, personal assistant. Like a random every episode, something happens and it's just like so funny. I'll make you watch an episode. We will watch one after this. Okay, but it's hilarious. And it's like, there's so many people getting murdered and stuff and it's like blood everywhere. But it's like funny, and I can't describe it but like it's so good. And it was able to bring me joy when I was in a dark place. So like I was like, This is great. This is what I need.

Rebel: 54:55

Are the camera people humans or vampire humans, and a

Shove: 54:59

couple of them die. Oh, Holy boy.

Rebel: 55:01

Oh no, because

Shove: 55:02

they're like a dangerous situation like, like vampires. And I'm like the werewolves and like,

Rebel: 55:08

Oh, I love that. Do you want to hear the other thing that I'm obsessed with right now? You're gonna be so mad at me.

Shove: 55:17

You want to save it for the next time? We're gonna talk about it. Now.

Rebel: 55:19

I want to talk about it right now, as it's really short. Okay, the other thing that I'm obsessed with right now is shove, whenever she like, falls asleep. But like, isn't going to sleep yet. Like not like going to bed. But like, let's say she was tired right now on on the couch, or like in the car. She like will fall asleep. And then she'll like, snore a little bit is like a light snore. And then she'll immediately like giggle. Like, like, wakes up. I begins the cutest

Shove: 55:51

girl. Like, it's when you're like, first one is like,

Rebel: 55:55

you can't even you can't even imitate it. Like,

Shove: 55:58

it's like, and like the laughing is what wakes me up. And I'm just like, Yeah, it's

Rebel: 56:02

like she laughs at herself snoring

Shove: 56:04

I think especially for every i think it's like a something's on to it's like a way I think it started as a way of like, for me to be like, play off that I fell asleep is like, if I'm laughing, it will look like I'm painted.

Rebel: 56:18

So cute. And it happens all the time. And it's happened more recently. And so I've noticed it and I was like, Do you know that you do this? And she's like, oh, yeah, like, it's so cute. I'm obsessed with it. Anyways, that's my obsession.

Shove: 56:32

So thanks for outing me. That's embarrassing. It's not

Rebel: 56:34

embarrassing. It's literally the cutest thing I've ever experienced.

Shove: 56:39

Anyways, I have some announcements to me announcement. One is that on our YouTube, we are now up to 884 subscribers.

Rebel: 56:50

Heck yeah.

Shove: 56:51

So we're pretty close to 1000.

Rebel: 56:56

We're really trying to get 1000 subscribers so we can monetize this podcast. Yeah. Because because of money right now you might be watching, like, if you're watching on the podcast on the YouTube, you may be watching ads, but we don't get any of that money. Yeah, it's annoying to get some money. Yeah, so

Shove: 57:13

you know, so

Rebel: 57:14

help us get the money that you're paying, but not paying. Yeah, cuz

Shove: 57:19

the two hours it takes forever to edit it that I don't know, I'm assuming it takes two hours to edit it. And then an hour or more of us just doing it live. So that's our time and and then we do have to pay to just have rights to the music and streaming services. This is an expensive hobby that we would like to have some money. Oh, man, I'd be so cool. Even though we know it won't be much. It'll be something to make me feel better. Like, oh, we should do it. So we can at least make $5 Which does not even cover the expenses of anything. But anyways, I'd also like to say, sweet, you'd have 1000 I finally hit 100k on Instagram. Yeah, I'd like a real go viral. And I finally found my people like my fatties in the world that like aren't skaters. And I think like, it's super cool. And I've been having messages from like all these fat people that are like, Oh my God, I didn't know that I could skate and skate forever. Like, I bought skates a year ago or a month ago. And like, I thought, because I was about that, like, that's where I was struggling to like it's kind of like reignited a whole new audience for me and like a platform for like me to share that, like people can do it at any size. So that's been really cool. I felt like I don't get that many questions about like skating and like beginner stuff anymore. And now it's like starting again. And I didn't really have reception that well all weekend. And I was like, Whoa, I think I'm gonna hit 100k By the time we leave. And sure enough, as of today, I made 102,000 or 200,000 copies and like, nothing really happens. And I was just like, Oh, that's cool. Like, for me, it was just like a fun like, Oh my God, and maybe when do you need to educate? Just like rebel was with subscribers on YouTube? Yeah, but on YouTube, it's a big deal to get like a POC and everything. And it's like, way harder. But um, I don't know. So then they were like, Oh, you got to do something like, and I was like, I don't know. Is that cheesy? Like, I know, so he will do it. But I'm like, I don't know. I don't I feel like I don't know. Like, like,

Rebel: 59:29

I think you should it's a big accomplishment a milestone.

Shove: 59:33

I remember. Like, didn't they do something for 10k? I don't even know. I think I just did like a post.

Rebel: 59:37

I probably I think it's something for 1k Two.

Shove: 59:42

I don't know. It's kind of cool. Because it's like, I feel like it's an accomplishment like Have I done anything? Yeah, I think I just have like impostor syndrome right now.

Rebel: 59:51

Yeah. I mean, like you literally created a platform and like, you share your own self and your vulnerabilities and you You are a role model for other people. And also a fashion icon. No,

Shove: 1:00:04

I think it feels like boastful, like, look at me, I got 100

Rebel: 1:00:08

I think it's less about like, boastful and more about like gratitude and acknowledgement of like, you see the people. It's not like the people that are following you don't mean anything. Yeah, like, Y'all are important to me. And I'm really grateful to have you along on this journey. And it does.

Shove: 1:00:26

And I know it's not gonna last because like, once a several stops training, it sounds like I'll lose, like, I literally lose, like, hundreds of followers a day.

Rebel: 1:00:34

But I don't think that this isn't gonna last,

Shove: 1:00:37

but like, I could easily drop under 100k. And that's not gonna make me cry anymore. And it's just like, it is funny. I was thinking about it, though. Like, on the drive, like, I was like, I'm driving home, like, how it's 2020 mean. And I feel like that's why it happened. Finally, because the past year is like being so like, wrapped up in the numbers and are like, being like, what did I do wrong? Like, people don't like me when I would like lose a lot of followers. I'm like, invested like it's a check, like my insights all the time. Like, oh my god, like how many people how many new followers like daily, I would check it sometimes multiple times a day. And then I just stopped like, I just like, was like, okay, whatever, post whatever I want, like, do whatever I want. Don't post at all. But specifically this year, as I said, it's 2020 me like, oh, like, I'm not just a skater, why am I pigeon holing my whole social media to only been skate content. Like I wanted it to be like, random deep things. I wanted to be like, just random things. I did whatever I want, like, use sounds that I think are like cheesy and fun and make me happy or like gym stuff, like, whatever I'm experiencing, that makes me feel creative posts it. And that's what I started doing. And then now this happens. And I'm like, I just I'm a firm believer that everything happens when it's supposed to. And that when you're trying too hard for something, it's not gonna work out like it has been natural. So I feel like, you know, like, what does that lucky girl emoji syndrome P girls, girl syndrome, everything wakes. And it's like funny because like, I hate like, Oh, lucky girl syndrome, but it's like, it's all it is, is manifesting. And I am a believer in manifesting and like, things do always work out the way it is. So I've seen that for a long time. But like we've been trying to save even more like all the time, like whenever pressure is like things always work out. Everything happens for a reason. And like so I think it's really cool. It is cool. That happened. I know. It's just a number, but it's just like, wow, like that many people saw me and it was like, I subscribe. I follow like nice. And I heard that that's pretty cool. And I'm most excited about having a larger platform now that kind of like, de stigmatize mental health and, like destroy fat phobia, and like all these things, and like, hopefully, like open the door to roller skating to like other people that didn't think they could so that's pretty cool. So as I'm saying that, maybe I will like, do something. I don't know. Because I've never had any time because I'm busy. Why am I always busy because of this one, but who likes to be busy her. So guess what? She likes being busy. She loves me, which means by default, I will be busy until I go into the grave. So I wrapped it all up.

Rebel: 1:03:27

She says busy like we don't do fun things like I'll literally make some 100k thing happen for you.

Shove: 1:03:33

I'm not saying that being busy, doesn't have fun things been busy though. All the things we do like it can be fun things with time. But then like when he gets to the end. The fun things don't even fall fine. If you've been too busy for a while.

Rebel: 1:03:48

Yeah. Oh my god, I forgot to tell you. But when I was at the Southwest thing, I ran into someone who is at the fat babe skate. That's so random at random. Like I was skating around and someone was like, oh my god, were you like are you from? Like LA area? And I was like, Yeah, I'm an LA roller girl. And she's like, she's like, Oh, I think I saw you like a little bit ago. Like a couple weeks ago at the Batman skate. I was like, Oh yeah, that's

Shove: 1:04:17

me. You're all walking around skate around LA roller. Like, are you from LA? And he's like, you're like No, Louisiana.

Rebel: 1:04:26

No, no, I wasn't wearing an LA roller. I was wearing like a was it funny? When That'd be funny. It

Shove: 1:04:33

was just the Louisiana Louisiana roller girl. bellies.

Rebel: 1:04:39

Yeah. But yeah, I thought that was funny. Is there skaters everywhere skaters everywhere.

Shove: 1:04:44

Did anyone recognize you when you were out and about there besides that?

Rebel: 1:04:49

No, I actually didn't really see anyone like we were very not out and about. We only were like walking around outside by ourselves and then we went to like very low pop related places. But I did rent my first electric scooter.

Shove: 1:05:06

And he didn't crash.

Rebel: 1:05:07

No, I didn't. But did you know that they cost basically the same amount as an Uber? Oh, what I know I was I thought so too. And it was $7 for me to get, like one mile somewhere. And I was like this. Oh, no. Expensive. Just wow. Yeah. All right. Well, well, thanks for hanging out with us. I'm in a much better mood now. And I definitely am glad that we recorded skate date tonight. And I love you all.

Shove: 1:05:33

I'm glad we did it too. So that way rebel wouldn't go to bed mad at me. I

Rebel: 1:05:38

never go to bed mad at you.

Shove: 1:05:40

Anyways, we gotta go so that I can make her watch this funny show. I can't wait.

Rebel: 1:05:45

Can't wait to see it. All right. Like, comment and subscribe if you're watching on the YouTube. And if you're listening on Apple podcast, give us a stellar review. And if you have any things that you'd like us to talk about, feel free to email us at Deer escape date@gmail.com.

Shove: 1:06:01

And we're also on Spotify. I don't do Apple Music. I know we're on.

Rebel: 1:06:05

We're on every streaming platform. But yeah, so try and put us on every streaming. Okay, bye